Keanu's Cape

Due to the stunning success of the Oscar-Award winning film The Matrix, Warner Brothers Studios have begun production on, not one, but two sequels. The Mullet Madness staff has been informed by a reliable source that the writer/director team of the Wachowski Brothers has already made a very special request of The Matrix star Keanu Reeves.

In an effort to increase the perceived power and virility of the film's main character, Neo, the Wachowski Brothers have begun work on the ultimate sci-fi mullet. For the past three months they have had Keanu Reeves on a strict diet of pork rinds, Miller Light and porn. Our inside source informs us that despite this regiment Keanu has just entered phase one of his training. "His mud-flap barely descends below the shoulder line. We're talking a Jerry Seinfeld type mullet. He hasn't even begun to approach the stellar level that Billy Ray Cyrus achieved a few years ago," commented our source.

"The Ape-Drape is such a powerful symbol that we felt a need to somehow incorporate it into our film," said Andy Wachowski. "We grew up fearing the intense ferocity of such famous mullets as those grown by Great White and Lioness in the early 80's."

Unfortunately fans will have to wait until Summer of 2002 to experience this sflby's power. Until then anxious fans are left to wonder, "What is the Mullet?"