"I knew this film would be a growing experience for me personally but this I never expected," stated Hanks at a recent press conference where he unvieled his new Canadian Passport. In Cast Away, Hanks plays Chuck Noland, a FedEx employee who must transform himself physically and mentally after crash landing on a deserted island. For the role Hanks lost nearly 60 pounds and grew a full beard and long hair.

"After shooting the movie, I myself had changed just as Chuck had changed. My long hair and beard were a symbol of that for me," commented Hanks. Unable to decide between his traditional nice-guy short cut and the Neo-Hanks hair look, Hanks's stylist Giovanni Fellini suggested a mullet.

"Only by combining BOTH the short, old Hanks hair and the new, free, party hair is Tom able to transform himself from the man he was before the movie to the real man he has become because of his new experiences," explained Hanks's wise stylist.

It is this writers opinion that the Academy must honor Hanks with an Oscar for his wonderful acting and his amazing courage to rock the mullet on such a grand scale.